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Psst, we rounded up even more super-quiet vibrators we love if volume is important to you. You may also want to explore all-new toys together, to find something that fits your unique dynamic as a duo. Boyajian recommends turning toy research and shopping into a couple’s activity, a chance to build intimacy and mutual excitement and expectation. But Leigh cautions against falling into the trap of just exploring toys marketed for couples. There are a ton of guides online, some backed by sexual health experts.

You might emphasize that vibrators can open you up to different sensations, fantasies, and positions. They are not a stand-in for another person—they simply enhance your time together, let you get to know each other better, and have some fun. When you do incorporate a sex toy, be considerate and take things slowly. The term sex toy can also include BDSM apparatus and sex furniture such as sex swings